Friday, January 23, 2009


We’re just wired differently. Yet, men and women share the same space, each carving a little nook that they can retreat to for a time, alone. I pondered over how quick the female is to want to build a nest. The male takes his time before deciding to nest. Both want the nest; there’s no time limit for a man (in his mind), but the woman wants it immediately. I can’t speak for a man; for a woman, I know that making a home gives her a sense of security.

We women love to build castles in the air. We dream of creating a lovely home atmosphere for a man, of nourishing and caring for him, of catering to his unspoken needs and desires, of creating a space to nurture and love, to build a home brick-by-brick. We know that this is what we want and we yearn to stabilize our lives with the nest. It’s hard to wait indefinitely to build.

Most of the men I know, even before they’ve considered marriage, have made a home for themselves, even in rented accommodation. The women I know have never made their houses homes until they move to a space they view as permanent. This is the quintessential difference between a man’s view and a woman’s in creating home space. Funny, isn’t it?

The man wants to settle his finances, stabilize his routine, get more snug in the relationship before nesting; the woman is ready to go as soon as she knows that ‘he’s the man’.

I surprised myself with the slow seepage of tears that seem to flow out so easily lately, with no apparent trigger. Perhaps as K say, it’s some pent up emotion that’s manifesting itself in this form…

For the time being…I’m happy, I’m ecstatic. I feel wonderful and think that good things will happen if I stop fretting about tomorrow. I have someone strong who’s with me. I have faith in us.

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